New brings challenge and untested waters and calls on us to act and behave in certain ways we may not have done before. They can collide with closely held beliefs about the self and the world which can see an individual struggling with a transition from a previous situation into a new one. A person in this phase is essentially building new neural pathways in their brain and it takes much more work to lay down bricks by oneself as opposed to old ones that may have been laid down by our family, friends and other people we have experienced over the course of our lives. Embracing the new means rewiring our brains. And that’s hard.
Challenging closely held beliefs takes extra effort and a good scoop of bravery. For me, it’s a course I’m doing at the moment in starting your own business. I’ve always worked for employers so it demands of me a completely new perspective on risk, acquiring essential skills never practiced before e.g. team building, leadership and weathering through a series of emotional hurdles (e.g. anxiety) that I never expected.
Through all of this, I’ve had to teach myself self-compassion and patience for myself and others. I’ve had to try new techniques to manage my anxiety and maintain an open mind towards the other people on my course.
I’ve found that once I started to let go of a variety of issues that have arose as a result of being on the course, I had Feng Shuied the clutter in my mind and had more space within to allow for new information and ways of outlook. I then began to practice something called ‘Bracketing’, a term referenced in a book called The Road Less Travelled.
‘Bracketing’ refers to whenever someone is experiencing something new for the first time, that they practice a self-disciplining technique of leaving their past experiences, prejudices and other experiences at the door so there is no room for comparison and observe whatever is going on in a non-judgemental way. This leaves ample room for more learning and seeing things/people as they really are.
Another interesting approach is what Buddhists call The Beginner’s Mind. It’s a state of mind where there is no mental attachment to achievements or the self and all possibilities are accepted. The mind is empty and filled with compassion.
I’ve personally found these kinds of practices difficult, as my mind always wants to race off on it’s own tangent and switch back to default mode. But what I’ve gained from using approaches has been unreal. Your perspective on yourself and the world completely changes you, and you are altered permanently. I have by no means mastered them and my mind still runs on it’s default Grand Prix race most of the time. But I’ve had glimpses and insight enough to know they are worth attaining and you take this with you everywhere.
You find on this kind of journey that choices you made previously on your life are non-nonsensical and you begin to become the master of your own life. You eventually move to a place where you are totally in control of your life. Certainly, not all events and people that are in it but insofar as within the capacity of yourself and actions.
Once you move to that final stage people will be naturally drawn to you, unconsciously moving towards you because your way of life is what they want themselves, whether they know it or not.