This post is a little different than my previous entries as it relates to a very recent experience I encountered, and I feel the need to share what I’ve learnt.
I was recently rejected by someone (with very good reason) who I liked a lot and whom I had gotten close to very quickly over a short period of time very unexpectedly. I suppose I had the haze of love hearts that bubbled out of me over this person, and there was serious chemistry and attraction.
This is the second time I couldn’t be with someone I liked and once again I found myself in a position of yearning but not having. But this is the jewel of the learning that I discovered the next day; only you alone can save yourself. You are totally responsible to how you react. If you decide to cry, then do that, but at the very least come away with some understanding and learning from it.
Abraham Lincoln once said, ‘What hurts, instructs.’
If this scenario highlighted anything for me it was the urgency to ensure that I had a stable and healthy relationship with myself, and it gave my wavering identity a full on, solid boost. Something snapped and when it did I realised that no matter what happens in this life, I am and always will be my own hero. I may not always be able to depend on others, but I can depend on me and there is some comfort in that. And it was an inspiring realisation, I was almost a little proud of myself for coming to that conclusion.
I don’t need anything from anyone to make me feel valid, I am as I am. If you have enough love within yourself, it’s all you really need. You are already whole.